The First Step.

The Lord is funny. He doesn't waste any time using you when you are truly willing! Back in April, the Lord put an opportunity in front me to share at our annual Women's Retreat. I freaked out of course. I don't like to talk in front of large groups of people. It was a HUGE stretch for me. Not only did the Lord completely change my whole entire teaching 48 hours before our retreat started… BUT I also learned the hard way that I hold my breath when I read out loud or speak in public. I may have almost passed out. :) 

I wanted to share my teaching with you because the Lord blessed me greatly by it, and because it goes along with the theme of this blog. 

Diving Deeper,

Melissa

P.S.

If you would like to hear how ridiculous I sounded at the retreat, feel free to check out the recording (and all the other teachings from our retreat) on the Cornerstone Christian Fellowship media page. Mine is called "Diving In". :)

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I have to confess when Toni asked me to do this, I may have panicked - just a little. And by little, I really mean a lot. I don't mind being up here in front of you lovely ladies, as long as I am behind a guitar and music stand. In fact, I actually may have considered writing this in the form of a song, but unfortunately, I am not gifted in song writing like some people I know. :) But really, this is something I never ever thought I'd do… but here I am… 

Matthew 14:22-33 (English Standard Version (ESV)

22 Immediately he made the disciples get into the boat and go before him to the other side, while he dismissed the crowds. 23 And after he had dismissed the crowds, he went up on the mountain by himself to pray. When evening came, he was there alone, 24 but the boat by this time was a long way[a] from the land,[b] beaten by the waves, for the wind was against them. 25 And in the fourth watch of the night he came to them, walking on the sea. 26 But when the disciples saw him walking on the sea, they were terrified, and said, “It is a ghost!” and they cried out in fear. 27 But immediately Jesus spoke to them, saying, “Take heart; it is I. Do not be afraid.”28 And Peter answered him, “Lord, if it is you, command me to come to you on the water.” 29 He said, “Come.” So Peter got out of the boat and walked on the water and came to Jesus. 30 But when he saw the wind,[c] he was afraid, and beginning to sink he cried out, “Lord, save me.” 31 Jesus immediately reached out his hand and took hold of him, saying to him, “O you of little faith, why did you doubt?” 32 And when they got into the boat, the wind ceased. 33 And those in the boat worshiped him, saying, “Truly you are the Son of God.”

This chapter starts out with the beheading of John the Baptist. Jesus hearing this news, tries to get away for a bit. He takes the boat and tries to get to a desolate place - but the crowds won't let him as they have followed him. What I love about this passage is that despite the terrible news Jesus had just received, and despite any grief, sadness, or weariness he may have felt, he still chose to serve the people. It says he had compassion on them and healed their sick. He even does something AMAZING - he feeds all five thousand of them with a mere five loves and two fish! with leftovers! 

When you think about it, this is really convicting. When I get bad news, or I don't feel well, or I'm just having a bad day, serving others is the furthest thing from my mind. But for Christ - it was the first thing on his mind. Our response in hard times is going to prove who is at the center of our lives and our hearts. If it's all about me - well, my actions are going to reflect that. If it's all about HIM - then my actions will bring glory and praise to Him. 

So the Jesus takes the disciples into the boat and and tells them to head to the other side - but He doesn't go with them. He spends this time alone in prayer. While he's praying on one side of the sea, his disciples are fighting a terrible storm while trying to cross the sea. 

"Coming from the side of Gennesaret, back across the sea, there is that valley that comes into the Sea of Galilee, from the Mediterranean where, when they get these storms, it usually blows in through that Chinnereth Valley. And so in coming back, you're coming against that wind that comes howling through that valley. And so the disciples were faced with this dismal prospect of trying to row against the wind and against the flow of the wind-whipped waves, because they were heading back towards the area of Capernaum. And so they were in the midst of the sea. And they were being tossed with the waves, for the wind was coming from that direction of the Mediterranean." (Chuck Smith's commentary on Matthew 14)

I picture the disciples trying to guide their boat against something like the wind that comes howling through the Columbia River Gorge sometimes (which I'm sure pales in comparison to this storm - but it's what my mind can grasp!). I lived in Troutdale for a couple of years when I was younger, right on the edge of the Gorge - and that wind - man, it could almost blow a kid over! I love the KJV of this verse - it says that the "wind was contrary". The Greek word used here means "Over, against… opposed as an adversary, hostile, antagonistic in feeling or act.". The wind had become like and adversary to them. They were literally fighting against it to get to the other side of the sea. The ESV version says they were "battered by the waves" - battered means to "torture (yikes!), to be harassed or distressed." None of that sounds fun. This wasn't just any old rain storm - this was a violent storm.

There are so many things in this world that come up against us… The enemy likes to use anything and everything to beat us up, to batter us. He wants to push us right into the middle of the storm - so he can find a weakness and gain a foothold in our lives in our hearts. And it's easy to give into hopelessness and fear when you are in the heart of the storm...

But, there, in the middle of the storm, is Jesus. 

At first, they were scared. Think about it - they were in the middle of this HUGE storm, where the boat was being thrown from side to side… And there's Jesus, in the middle of the sea, just having a walk. At least that is how I picture it. :) Jesus immediately speaks to them and tells them who it is. 

The Greek word for "saw" (when the disciples saw him (26),  and later on in vs. 30, when he [Peter] saw the wind) means to "to turn the eyes to anything; turn thoughts or direct a mind to a thing, to consider, contemplate, to look at, weigh carefully, to examine". So the disciples turned their eyes from the storm and turned them to Christ… Peter, having done this, asks the Lord to bring him out on the water… The Lord says "Come"… and Peter steps out of the boat… and is upheld miraculously on the water! 

When our eyes are on Christ - when we rely on Him for all things and we have complete faith in Him - he can do amazing things in us and through us. 

Matthew 17:20: 

He replied, "Because you have so little faith. I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you. "

Peter literally walked on water because he had faith in the Lord and his eyes were on Him. But how easy it is to let our eyes slip away and focus on something else. 

I looked up three different versions of this scripture: KJV, ESV, and The Message… KJV says that Peter went "to Jesus"… The ESV says that he "came to Jesus"… the Message says that he went "to go to Jesus". The first two versions (in my opinion) seem to imply that Peter was right there - in front of Jesus - when he suddenly looked at the storm and became afraid. He had walked who knows how many feet to get to this point, and when he was face-to-face with Christ, he suddenly looks away. That's how easy it is to be distracted by the things of this world, the storms and trials that come our way. We could be face first in some amazing thing that the Lord has done for us, and still our flesh would want us to look away. 

Thank goodness the Lord is always there to save us. 

Because Peter has turned his eyes away from the Lord, he begins to sink. The Message says that he "looked down at the waves churning beneath his feet, he lost his nerve and started to sink…" Despite having witnessed miracles not only now - in this very moment - but many times before, Peter (and the rest of the disciples) still question the truth of who Jesus was. He actually walked in their midst, did miraculous things, and they still weren't exactly sure who He was or what He could do. And he's so patient with them - he continues to show them His character through his teachings, his interactions with the people, and his miracles. All Peter had to do was look at Jesus - keep his eyes completely on Him - and he would have been right back on top of that water.

In this moment of doubt and fear, Peter shows that he knows exactly who to call to - and he cries out to the Lord "Save me!". And the Lord immediately - no hesitation at all - reaches down and grabs his hand.  Jesus' reaction is immediate - there was no "Oops, you failed, now dig yourself out of this mess!". If it had been me - I might have let Peter sweat it out a bit - maybe let the water get up to chest before I pulled him out - which is exactly why God is God and I am not. :) Peter is now safe, in the hand of Christ, but the Lord chastises him a bit. He says "O you of little faith, why do you doubt?" Doubt means "to feel uncertain about, disbelieve, question the truth or fact of something; to stand in two ways". Peter saw the truth - that Jesus had the power to allow him to walk on water - yet he saw the reality of the water and began to doubt. Thank goodness the truth about who Christ is doesn't change just because we doubt… and The Lord pulls Peter to safety. 

"It is no new thing for Christ's disciples to meet with storms in the way of duty, but he thereby shows himself with the more grace to them and for them. He can take what way he pleases to save his people… Nothing ought to affright those that have Christ near them, and know he is theirs; not death itself. Peter walked upon the water, not for diversion or to boast of it, but to go to Jesus; and in that he was thus wonderfully borne up. Special supports are promised, and are to be expected, but only in spiritual pursuits; nor can we ever come to Jesus, unless we are upheld by his power. Christ bade Peter come, not only that he might walk upon the water, and so know his Lord's power, but that he might know his own weakness. And the Lord often lets his servants have their choice, to humble and prove them, and to show the greatness of his power and grace. When we look off from Christ, and look at the greatness of opposing difficulties, we shall begin to fall; but when we call to him, he will stretch out his arm, and save us…. Even in a stormy day he is to them a very present help. None but the world's Creator could multiply the loaves, none but its Governor could tread upon the waters of the sea: the disciples yield to the evidence, and confess their faith. They were suitably affected, and worshipped Christ. He that comes to God, must believe; and he that believes in God, will come. " (Matthew Henry)

No matter what - the Lord is there to save us. He is the only one who is able to. No one on earth, nothing we can do can save us. Only Him. And like the disciples, that is why we worship Him. Because He is mighty, powerful, beautiful, forgiving, loving, kind, compassionate, and many other wonderful things. Because He gave up his very life to save our wretched hides. We are nothing - yet he gave everything for us. 

"Dive Deep. Drown willingly."

As most of you know, I am a bit of a book nerd. Okay, I am a BIG book nerd. So it's normal for me to tie a book into a Bible Study or something. This line is from the "Circle Trilogy" by Ted Dekker. Some of you may have heard of him - he is a Christian author. This specific series is about Thomas, a man from our time who gets transported to a whole other reality set in the future. It is in this reality that he finds Elyon (or God)… There's lot of action… romance… and a sweet portrayal of the love God has for us. In this other reality, there are two groups of people. The followers of Elyon and the Horde (also called Scabs). The Horde does not follow Elyon and are subject a skin disease of this world (hence the name Scabs). The followers of Elyon do not have this because the bathe in the waters of Elyon every day. The Scabs can become clean if they believe in Elyon and drown in His waters. Thomas tries to explain this to a Scab and she asks "Why don't you just throw some Scabs in so they can become like you?" He responds, "The drowning only works if it is done willingly". Later in the third book, this Scab decides to follow Elyon and dives deeply into His water and is made new. 

This idea of "diving deep" is something that the Lord has been saying to me ever since the first of the year. It has been part of every study I have done, every sermon I have heard,  and a part of almost every conversation I have had in one form or another. I read in a book this week "When God is speaking to me about a particular issue, I cannot escape it. Around every corner there is a sermon or a Bible study lesson or a speaker's topic or a conversation with a friend that is consistent with what I have been hearing from God in my time alone with Him." I laughed so hard because that was exactly what He did to me! I was surrounded by this idea of diving deep, going all in… It was everywhere. 

One of my favorite worship songs right now is "Oceans (Where Feet May Fail)". I first heard it back in December when I went to a women's dinner at another church. I instantly fell in love with it. Once January came around and the Lord started prompting me to dive deep, I heard it at least once a day on the radio either to or from work. The words spoke straight to my soul and went along completely with what the Lord was ministering to me. 

For me - instead of a boat and a storm, it felt more like a huge cliff… And I couldn't see what was over the edge unless I crept very close to the edge and tried to peer over. I would catch glimpses of things that the Lord had for me - just small little bits - but I was still afraid of jumping off that cliff. After many nights studying the word, talking with a friend and praying over it, I knew I just had to say yes. To whatever was over that edge. I just needed to leap.

"Living a life of faith means never knowing where you are being led, but it does mean loving and knowing the One who is doing the leading" (Chambers)

And when I realized this and committed to it, everything changed. I experienced freedom in my worship… I experienced a changed heart in regards to church and fellowship… I felt the need to be more meaningful with my time… Cutting out things that were distracting me from the Lord… and through all of this, I have seen the Lord provide so many opportunities for me… Things that I never thought I'd do (including this!). He has been so faithful to continue to work in me… changing and molding me… All I had to do was say "yes". 

Now, my life is still far from perfect. I didn't say yes and jump over the cliff into a life with no struggle - in fact, as some of you know, the last 10 weeks have been incredibly hard on me physically… I've struggled with things I never thought I'd have problems with… And I still struggle with doubt and fear, I still struggle with mood swings and harsh words (and my family can attest to that), I still struggle with making wrong choices and falling flat on my face. I still fail. As did Peter. That's one of things that I like about this scripture - Peter… One of Jesus' own disciples… was still human… And as we see later on his life, he even turns his back on Christ. But boy, he comes back strong, full of faith, and on fire for the Lord. That gives me hope. That even though I have bad days, and I may do the wrong thing, the Lord is able and more than willing to forgive me and give me the strength to overcome those challenges. 

So my question to you this morning: is there a cliff the Lord is asking you to jump off of? Or a nice safe boat he is asking you to climb out of? 

Do it. I dare you. 

Don't put it off any longer.

Dive deep. Drown willingly. Let everything that is not of the Lord die off… Any chains that bind you… and burdens that may drag you down… He will be faithful to remove them… 

Is the Lord enough for you to jump? Can you give up everything that you may want or feel you need and say that He is sufficient for you?

Everything that the Lord would ask of you is able to be done - even now - no matter what he asks us to give up or step out in faith to do. So, don't allow fear to come between you and what the Lord has for you. The Lord wants to make a way for you - He is able to and willing to do anything and everything to take care of us.